Jay (00:00.793)
Welcome to the Reef of Horrors, volume two with special guest. I'm so excited. I can't, I can't hold it back. Mr. Jack Durr. Jack the Ripper Durr. I don't know. We got to give you a Halloween name here. Hey Jack, how you doing?
Jack Der (00:20.734)
Yeah, I guess that's pretty easy. Whatever your name's Jack. Jack-o'-lantern, you know. Jack, yeah. It pretty much goes. I'm doing good. And it is the season. I've been kind of like embracing it slightly with some of the photos I'm posting. It's like I post things like Orange or I posted something the other day. I don't know if you've seen the TV show Last of Us on HBO. It's a...
Jay (00:29.821)
Yeah, you can come up with whatever you want.
Jay (00:47.417)
No. I played the video game though, a long time ago.
Jack Der (00:51.154)
Okay, well the video game would equate to the right thing. So I have a, no you weren't on that dive. You were gone that day. It's a closeup of a two-spot octopus, it's eye. It totally looks like a clicker from The Last of Us. And I'm like, but I posted it and I am bad at my subtleties with the way, I assume everybody has the same thought process of me.
And I thought for sure everyone would get that. And everyone's like, wow, pretty photo. I'm like, well, yeah, it is a pretty photo. But no one gets the last of us part of it. It's a clicker. It has the big, it looks like one of those things. I don't know.
Jay (01:31.377)
Yeah, you.
Jay (01:37.117)
Yeah, I hate it when other people can't read my mind. It drives me nuts, right? Come on. That was funny.
Jack Der (01:43.391)
Yeah, I'm like the Mr. Reference obscure things, and it's like no one ever gets it. Unless I go to Comic-Con or something. Then people go, oh.
Jay (01:51.509)
Well, hopefully today, there you go. Exactly, you have to have the right audience. Then everyone will get your references. So if you're tuning in today, no, you haven't tuned into the wrong podcast. This is still the dive table. But this is volume two of our annual Reef of Horror show in honor of all Hallows Eve, Halloween. And again, we gotta give credit where credit's due. So I'm a huge Simpsons fan.
I have been for a very long time. It's wild, because I think I can remember when I was the same age as Bart. Like Bart and I were technically the same age. So it's been a while. Excuse me, but in honor of The Simpsons, because The Simpsons every year, for however, 30 whatever years it is now, they release a Halloween special they call The Treehouse of Horrors, where they tell three stories, either remixed, you know,
classic stories and scary tales, or they make up their own, that feature the Simpsons as the characters in an only Simpsons way. And so we have adopted the tree house of horrors, but adapted it for our scuba context, and we call it the Reef of Horrors. And this is volume two, and I'm so happy to share it with you, Jack. So you ready to get into the fun of this episode?
Jack Der (03:18.95)
I do feel honored that you chose me to speak in this realm, you know, because, you know, I know I always I'm good at like joking around and poking fun. And I was sitting there like, Oh, how can I be like, yeah, what is scary? I dove with you. No, I'm just kidding. You're not a scary dive. I was like, so.
Jay (03:42.177)
That is a scary experience, isn't it? Yeah, you never know where I'm gonna pop up next.
Jack Der (03:47.306)
So I'm like, oh, no, that doesn't work. He's a good diver, really. So it's like, where are these? I'll try to reference how could I get that snuck in there, you know? I do make fun of myself though, you know? It's like, fins everywhere, but.
Jay (03:58.089)
I love it.
Jay (04:02.645)
Yeah, no. Well, good. So to set this one up very quickly, you and I have each prepped three horror, scuba horror stories. And we'll just go back and forth and share our scuba reef of horrors Halloween special stories and laugh about them and bounce off each other. It'll be a lot of fun. So let's get into this one in the reef of horrors volume two.
It's the best scary voice I've got. Yeah, exactly. Your house is not haunted. It's just me. All right. You want me to? I'll tell the first one. I'll go first one here. So this first Reef of Horrors scuba horror story is the tale of the neglected Octo. The tale of the neglected Octo. So this one, a caveat here is not me, but it's someone we all know.
Jack Der (04:35.124)
And it's like cue, creaky.
Jack Der (04:42.776)
Yes.
Jay (05:01.889)
who we refer to as Pradan. So if you can figure it out who that is, you'll know whose octo this was. So here's how the story goes. A diver, unknown diver, who in the context of diving in lakes and specifically in lakes in Texas, we have a big infestation of what's called zebra mussels, which are basically they look like clams or mussels.
and they're an invasive species because nothing really eats them and they just overtake a lake like crazy. Once they're in there, it just goes nuts and they're everywhere. So this particular diver who also happens to be a professional diver, a dive master, you know, was using his gear for however long and...
you know, like most of us do as mechanics might do as they know, you know, their car needs service. They know it'll go a little longer. Had maybe pushed off his, you know, servicing of his gear, specifically the gear that would be shared with a diver, like someone in an open water class that needed to share gas or share air, the octopus, the Octo, that bright yellow, you know, in the triangle.
device that might save someone's life. He may have pushed the envelope on the service timeline of this. And so the tale goes that he decided at one point to finally service this piece of equipment because it is something that may be needed on a dive and brought it into his local dive shop. And as they opened up the
second stage regulator. So the one that you actually breathe off of as they open that up to the whore of the service technician, it was packed full of zebra mussels.
Jack Der (07:06.536)
Ugh.
Jay (07:10.601)
Now, luckily no one ever had to receive that Octo in the course of a dive. But the tale goes that imagine a diver, a nice open water diver who's just on dive three, day two of their open water, real open water course, and for whatever reason they panic or for whatever reason they didn't check their gas or change their tank, things happen, right? Things happen, Jack.
It might happen. Can you imagine that poor diver who goes to this particular unnamed diver and says, I'm out of gas, and whatever way they will. Open water diver, maybe they just like bug eyes and freak out. And unknown diver, sorry, unnamed diver looks at that open water student.
Jack Der (07:43.038)
Never, never diving.
Jack Der (08:08.866)
who happens to have a name that sounds like.
Jay (08:13.089)
That's the name that sounds like annual. There you go. It just sounds like annual. First name sounds like dooser. Dooser, yeah, there we go. Dooser, annual, there you go. Can you just imagine that with a water diver? And they go, I'm out of gas, big bug eyes, and cool and smooth. I'm a pro. I got this. I reach into my triangle of goodness. I pull out my big yellow hosed octo, and I go, I got you, and shove that baby right to that.
open water diver and can you imagine the horror that person would have of breathing off of that? I think they would be out of scuba right then and there. They might get to the surface because I don't think it inhibited completely the function. I'm sure quite a bit, but completely. But they would have been breathing the carcasses and nastiness of zebra mussels to save their life.
Jack Der (09:08.874)
Were they alive still or are they dead? So that's my thing is like, how, I mean, if you're diving enough and like you kept it wet enough that they're alive and like growing in there, or was it like truly like dead shells? And...
Jay (09:23.977)
From what I saw, I saw the pictures. That's all I can comment on. The pictures look like dead because they come out of the water for a week and die. The real question I have for this particular unnamed diver is, how do you not smell that, bro? Like that had to stink in your truck for days.
Jack Der (09:39.994)
Right.
Jack Der (09:46.206)
Yeah, so you haven't, haven't experienced this yet where, I mean, you may have, but we have these bait balls in San Diego, um, little sardine type things, and they'll just come in like swarms. And at night they don't realize you're there and they just plow into you and they'll like embed themselves in all your dive gear. Um, so one of my friends on this one night, he goes, yeah.
Next morning, you know, he dove and then he threw his stuff in his trunk. I was going to rinse it the next day and he pulled it out. It was like stinking and ins bedded into parts of his BCD. He had all these like anchovy or sardines stuck inside of his BCD, just rotting away overnight. I'm like,
Jay (10:30.058)
Oh
Jack Der (10:34.143)
Yeah, so...
Jay (10:34.401)
I don't know which one's worse, that stank or the stank of like your dry suit after like seven days of using the same undergarment on a dive trip. Like, I don't know which one's worse. Yeah.
Jack Der (10:47.313)
Yeah, that's TMI. Wash it.
Jay (10:54.161)
Sometimes you don't have a washing machine, you're like in the ocean. So sometimes you just live with the stink. It doesn't bother anyone under the water.
Jack Der (10:56.078)
I'm gonna go to bed.
Jack Der (11:00.806)
Yeah, so that, just the thought of the stuff in the Octo, I mean, that's one of the reasons why I bought a regulator early on, because I remember taking my open water class in the rental, and it's like the first breath off it in the pool, it was like, ugh, and it was like sand, and I'm like, so I just imagine like, go, and sucking in all this like, ugh, zebra mussels, ugh, that would kinda suck, like literally suck.
Jay (11:17.845)
Hahaha!
Jay (11:22.604)
Oh my god.
Jay (11:27.313)
Yeah, that would suck. I wish that it was discovered like because he was testing it underwater. That would have been funnier. Yeah. Just.
Jack Der (11:35.421)
It's a little gritty.
Jay (11:43.613)
Man, this is gonna be a tough episode. I've been recovering from this cough and every time I laugh, it makes me cough. So I'm just gonna be coughing throughout this whole episode. It's gonna be terrible. All right, so the tale of the neglected Akko.
Jack Der (11:54.241)
We'll put you on 100% oxygen.
Jay (11:56.133)
Yeah, exactly. It looks like I need it at this point. Um, yeah, the, uh, the tale of the neglected octo, if there's a positive in this is to service your gear regularly. And especially if you have that octo that just sits there for however long, cause it never gets used unless it needs to be used to confirm its function form. And then it's not full of dead animals would probably be good idea.
Jack Der (12:22.974)
Yes. I mean, I know that mine probably needs to be serviced because when I go and breathe off it, it's just kind of like, okay, I can deal with that because that's mine. I'm donating the long hose. So like, okay, I can deal with that. Knowing that I'm giving up the good one to somebody else.
Jay (12:31.467)
I'm out.
Jay (12:37.449)
You should...
Jay (12:41.609)
Have you ever used the trick of like, you know, Oh, I wonder what that scuba pro MK 19 breeze like. And then you just go to somebody and be like, I'm out of gas that has that donate the
Jack Der (12:47.812)
Uh, well, that, that does.
Jack Der (12:57.692)
I've done that before where you're like breathing off your own regulator and it's like, oh, because I like diving my aluminum 80, I get it, and I'm diving with people that have steel 100s and their air consumption is as good or better than mine and they go, here, share some air, and I'm breathing off theirs and I'm like, wow, is that how a regulator is supposed to breathe?
Jay (13:18.424)
Hehehehehe
Jay (13:22.123)
Hehehehehehe
Jack Der (13:23.274)
Like, hmm, is it maybe I need to service my regulators or is it they're just that much better? I mean, that's just.
Jay (13:30.353)
Yeah, it's true. It's true. Though the funniest part about sharing gas is, and we're already on a tangent, but it's kind of funny, is when you know you train with someone too often, when you know what to expect, the flavor to expect when you put their rag in your mouth from a gas share. I'm like, I'm either getting Monster or Cologne. It's one of those two when I do this gas share. So here it comes. It's Monster today. That's a little bit nicer. That tastes good.
Jack Der (13:47.873)
Ugh.
Jay (14:00.169)
The Cologne days is always like, whoa, it's too much, too much, but I got to breathe, so deal with it. So.
Jack Der (14:08.23)
Yeah, uh, yeah, don't want to go there. I'm too OCD for that stuff. I just don't want to think about it. It's like Flush the regulator a few times and then No, no, I can wait. I can wait. Let's just flush this a few times purge flush
Jay (14:11.049)
Don't...
Jay (14:15.113)
Don't think about it.
Jay (14:19.017)
BX.
Jay (14:24.189)
He's just out of gas and you just hand it back like no, I'm just gonna hold my breath as long as I can. I'm not putting that in my mouth anymore.
Jack Der (14:32.842)
Yep, we'll just simulate this now.
Jay (14:34.357)
All right, over to you for your first reef of horror story.
Jack Der (14:41.322)
Okay, so we've probably all, well I'm hoping everyone's traveled at some point in time, they've gone outside their ordinary environment and dove other places. And I traveled to Mexico, it's not my normal place, would be in the Playa del Carmen area, and I bring my dry suit because I'm going cave diving, right? And
You go to the dive shop, they always take care of you. You can rinse your gear, you can hang it up, and all this stuff like that. I'm like, wow, this is really convenient. Then go out to eat that night, have some beer or whatever, get ready for the next morning, come back, all your gear's right there, take it off, and just get ready to go to the dive. So that was the normal method. That's how it all started. And then one day,
One of the guys that was a tourist, not tourist, when I say tourist, someone visiting, cave diver, did that with all his gear. We were at one of the dive sites and I saw the guy walking around. Yeah, no big deal. This big guy, he's like, great dive. And I'm like, wow, your dive was a little short. I didn't think anything of it, right? Just kind of like no big deal. Just went, whatever.
Later on that day, after all our dies were done, he was still at the dive shop because I think he was doing like his full cave or one of those things. So he was going through classes and stuff and then he pulls this out. I'm going to share my screen so this will go on your computer part. So just bear with me for one second. So he sits there and goes, yeah I cut it short because I had something in my wetsuit booty and I'm like
your wetsuit booty, kind of like what? Like rocks, and everything. And what it was, was this. Okay, so this is just like, to give you a little size perspective, this is a scorpion. Oh, that's a blurry picture. Here's a nice clear one. It is at least the size of a business card. This was in his wetsuit booty. He dove for like an hour.
Jay (16:48.824)
Oh my gosh.
Jay (16:57.343)
Oh my.
Jay (17:02.13)
Yeah, no kidding.
Jack Der (17:07.114)
with this thing in his wetsuit. And I'm like, going, I'm like freaking out at the dive shop going, so did it sting you? There's, oh yeah, at least two or three times. I'm like, uh, aren't you supposed to go to the hospital now? Something like that. I'm like, going, I know that they're supposed to be like kind of deadly, I think. And I'm like.
Jay (17:07.716)
Wow.
Jay (17:24.576)
Hahaha
Jack Der (17:35.786)
Maybe I don't know something, but this guy's walking around not thinking too much of a big deal. I'm like going, he goes, yeah, it was like a bee sting. I'm like, still, doesn't it like inject poison into you? Shouldn't you be like going to the hospital? And he's like, nah, I think I'm okay. And I'm like, he was a big guy. So maybe it's just that, you know, body mass, blood to the amount of poison that was injected. But he was like walking around and he's still doing the classroom afterwards. And I'm like, and he...
Jay (17:48.667)
Yeah.
Jack Der (18:04.726)
walks this thing around. I'm like going, holy crap! That and I go, where was your stuff? He goes, oh I was storing it right over there. Needless to say, after that point, the only thing I kept there were like fins, basic things. I took my dry suit with me back to where I stayed after that, and then always inverted and then before I put everything on I'm like shaking it. I'm like going, I do not want that inside my dry suit.
Jay (18:22.113)
Hehehe
Jack Der (18:33.886)
I'm just like, I'm in picturing not just inside my booty where he like squished it and got stung a few times while he in the process of getting killed. By the way, it got him on the inside of his instep. Oh, so yeah. So, so to me it's more like beware of the critters that you may not be aware of that are crawling around on your stuff at night. I mean I
Jay (18:33.904)
No.
Jay (18:48.405)
Oof.
Jay (18:51.936)
Wow.
Jack Der (19:01.854)
It's, it's bad enough to always have this like, so this is where I was going. Maybe it's not scary stories, but it's more like Jack's little new phobias are popping up everywhere that I didn't know I had.
Jack Der (19:15.182)
So it's like being enclosed in a dry suit, for example, with a scorpion in there, it's like, ah, no, that's not a good thing. I mean.
Jay (19:26.513)
Yeah, no, that sounds like some sort of mafia torture or something.
Jack Der (19:29.93)
like I'm just it's like well like even if it's just like some sort of bug I'm like crawling around I'd like ah so I'm like now whenever I travel um yeah the dry seat goes with me back to the room now and I turn it inside out and make sure it's all clear before I put it back you know for the next day it's like so it's more like you know just the thought of having that stuck to your body and being underwater in a cave somewhere where you can't just like pop to the surface
You know, but it's like, you know, like you didn't feel that. He goes, yeah, somewhere in a dive. I felt this thing. I'm like, no, didn't you feel it when you're walking to the.
Jay (20:09.869)
Yeah, no kidding, right? Like, would you put it on and you feel it was a little off? No.
Jack Der (20:14.474)
No, apparently, yeah, I didn't quite get that one, but I guess everyone has different sensitivities to things. So maybe that's why he was able to put up with this being stung while he's on his dive.
Jay (20:21.402)
I guess.
Jay (20:25.377)
I guess, yeah. That would, yeah, talk about, there's a good trading module for some crazy agency out there. This is the truly task load you. We stick scorpions in your dry suit and see if you can still do a valve drill. Go for it.
Jack Der (20:44.504)
Yeah, concentrate, conserve air, breathe easy, try to be relaxed.
Jay (20:47.365)
Yeah, exactly. Don't worry about the wiggly things crawling up your legs. Those are just, it's just normal. Everything is normal.
Jack Der (20:56.362)
Okay, I'm having one of those ants crawl on me on me feet.
Jay (21:00.921)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And what are you going to do about it? Like, once you recognize, let's say 10 minutes into the dive, 15 minutes into the dive, you realize there's something crawling on my body. I don't know what it is, by the way, because you don't. A scorpion, a centipede, a snake. I don't know. What are you going to do about it? Like, you're going to try to...
Jack Der (21:21.218)
Right.
Jack Der (21:29.355)
Right.
Jay (21:29.769)
kill it in the like you'd be punching yourself like I don't know what do you do at that point you know like you can't abort the dive in terms of if you're in the cave especially so
Jack Der (21:39.582)
Immediately, right. Yeah, you can still end the dive and turn and go back, but you still need to go back, right?
Jay (21:47.241)
Yeah, you still have at least, well, in that case, 15 minutes back out of that happening. Man, that would be, that has not happened to me yet. Thank God. And it is, I've heard other stories of divers in Texas and other places, Mexico especially as well, of similar things getting into dry suits. But yeah, I mean, yeah, what is the protocol? Let's call some folks up, let's find out.
Jack Der (22:14.604)
I know.
Just so you know, right now for me, if my sock is folded over inside my dry suit, I'm freaking out. It's like, ah, it's folded in the toe. I can't imagine if there's like a bug in there.
Jay (22:24.101)
Oh, you prima donna.
Jay (22:31.753)
The next dive we go on together, this weekend I'm going to slip a fake scorpion or something into your boots, see if you notice.
Jack Der (22:39.08)
drop it in there a little so this is where right now the animated spiders are dropping from the ceiling
Jay (22:46.137)
That's right. Yeah. Jack will never die with me again. He's too fearful for what I might put it. That's a good one. I like that one. That's a good reef of horror story. All right. You ready for, here's my number two. My number two. This one I gave the title of Clam Chowder's Revenge. I'm sure you know where this is going.
Jack Der (23:08.539)
Now, before you start this is like, I like Clam Chowder. I'm hoping that it's not gonna change my opinion of Clam Chowder. Okay.
Jay (23:11.998)
Yes.
Jay (23:15.437)
I hope it doesn't. It didn't mine. So hopefully it doesn't yours because I like clam chowder too. A little bit of Tabasco sauce. Sometimes the crunchy, sometimes not. Oh, a good clam chowder. You can't beat it. There's actually a really good lobster spot, a main lobster spot in Encinitas that has good clam chowder. So for all you San Diego folks, if you're looking for it, I think it's called the lobster shack or something like that, but it's delicious.
Jay (23:45.537)
on a dive trip to the Florida Keys. And I got to tell you, the Florida Keys are just littered with incredible fish shops. I mean, you can get the most incredible fish sandwiches and finish it off with a little slice of key lime pie and it's a little heaven. And so, I was out there for some training and we were doing some boat diving that got
canceled because of a small hurricane that went through. So we were shore diving for a couple of days and then the hurricane cleared out, boats were going out and we said, all right, great, let's go. And so I wasn't really thinking about, I've never been boat sick, I've never been seasick in my life, but I always still take a drama mean, the non-jowzy one the night before and I take one the morning of just in case. I've never experienced it, but I take it just in case.
Well, this particular day I didn't. And for lunch that day, we went to this incredible fish shop. You already go, this is going, don't worry, it has an ending. And we go to amazing fish shop and I had whatever, fish sandwich, and I just couldn't resist for whatever reason their clam chowder that day. Knowing I was gonna dive later, you're gonna burn it all off anyway, so it's all right, I'll indulge a little bit.
Jack Der (24:51.636)
I'm already grossed out. Just... What the fuck?
Jay (25:13.417)
So I had clam chowder and I had my fish sandwich and we, you know, geared up, we got to the boat on time, la la, everything's there. And I remember on the way out to the dive site, it was just choppy as all choppy. And I started to feel a little something I hadn't felt before, which was like, ugh, that doesn't feel good. And then, ugh, that really doesn't feel good. And then,
oh my gosh, I think I might puke is how I was feeling. So for all of you that have ever felt that sea sickness or boat sickness, I now can empathize because it never happened to me before until that day. This is like a year ago or something like that, a little less than a year ago. And so I was, I mean, as my, you know, type of teammates describe it, looking green, but holding it together. And of course, you know, the answer to that is get in the water.
Get in the water, you'll feel better. So I won't tell you. Plop on my doubles, we're training. I can't skip the training dive, right? I gotta go, I gotta go. So whatever I'm feeling, like I gotta go, I gotta be the first one to water. So I get in the water, we descend, still feeling, like that's the only thing I'm really thinking about is like can I actually hold this all together? And I remember throughout that first,
segment of the dive, there was this feeling. And then when it came again, hold it back. And then all of the things go through your brain of like, they all say if you're going to puke, you can just puke right through the regulator. But, ew, that's all I could think about. Hold it together. Ew, that's so gross. Don't do it.
the third one came. Oh no, no. And finally, I was able to control it. I started to feel better. And by the second half of that dive, I felt back to myself and felt better. So I didn't lose it through the regulator, but that clam chowder had its revenge in the sense that I almost lost it through the regulator. And for all of those that have actually puked underwater, my hat.
Jay (27:37.129)
goes off to you because I just can't imagine. Lesson learned, two lessons. One, take the drama meme dope. Number one.
Jay (27:49.217)
which I usually do, I just forgot. And lesson two is clam chowder, super heavy things right before you get on a dive boat or right before you're going out for some training. Probably better to make some different food choices at that point. So that was clam chowder's revenge. By the way, have you ever puked through a regular? I have to ask that.
Jack Der (28:11.318)
I actually did. So, and it was, and it was like one of those things that you remember. This is, by the way, all my horror stories happened like years and years and years ago, because now I'm like perfect. I mean, there's no issues at all these days. None whatsoever. No, I remember I had one of those greasy meal type things and I had one of those little moments of, ooh.
Jay (28:24.873)
Perfect.
Jay (28:29.4)
Hehehehe
Jack Der (28:40.45)
And so I just like let it go underwater. It was actually kind of pleasant, amazingly as it was. So, not to be into much detail, but on land it seemed like, oh, throwing up so strenuous, right? And it was just like, I was underwater and just went, you know, I'm just gonna let it go. And it was just like, and the best part was watching the.
Jay (28:46.045)
Oh really?
Jay (28:52.324)
Oh
Jay (29:09.381)
Oh my god. The vomit plumes.
Jack Der (29:13.814)
I was just like... And I was like... but it wasn't a lot. It was just a little bit. And I was like... and then immediately your next breath in is like air. It's like, oh that wasn't so bad. On the flip side, I you know, I would... when I used to do a lot more like dive tours, I actually had someone pull their regulator out of their mouth and then puke and then their first reaction was... and I'm like... I'm like... first I was like, what is this stuff floating by me?
Jay (29:40.331)
Ah. Yay.
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Jack Der (29:43.438)
right? And then watching them like trying to like breathe out a regulator, I'm like, ah, panic, you know, trying to shove it back in your mouth. So yeah, lesson for everybody, throw up right in your regulator. It works. But, and then just take it as like a cool little animated graphic.
Jay (29:56.125)
It works, it cleared it up.
Jay (30:02.485)
Yeah, your LSD trip underwater of like, whoa, what's happening? All these swirls. Oh, ugh.
Jack Der (30:05.742)
Yeah.
I do have a little side story that's not a pukey story on clam chowder. So there's a local dive boat for San Diego that they always have soup on board. So in between dives you can have a nice warm bowl of soup. And for some reason this day I was actually kind of hungry. I try usually because I don't want to get sick. I try to like wait for the food part.
But this day I was actually hungry and they and they're like, yeah, just go have some soup. And this was again, very early on in my diving days. So this is my first time on this boat. So I didn't really know what was going on. And I'm like, wow, that's kind of nice to have some food here. And I'm like, and I go, what is it? And they go, oh, it's clam chowder. And I'm like, oh, I like clam chowder. Just like I said. So like, wow, that's great. So I go over and get this, you know, a cup. I didn't do it in a bowl.
you know, because you just kind of drink it. So I put the stuff in and I'm like walking around and I'm like going.
to other divers, I'm like, come on, really? This is like the worst clam chowder. I can't believe this boat thinks that this is good clam chowder. So I'm like, oh, and so I'm like, drinking this clam chowder soup, going, wow, this is really bad. I'm like, do they, is this rotten? I'm like, what's going on? I'm like, maybe I should stop eating this, you know? So like, and I'm like, so I stopped partway through and just kind of like through the rest of it, I'm like, oh, wow, that clam chowder went really bad.
Jack Der (31:40.266)
I hope I don't get sick from this. And then later on at the end of the dive, I'm like, guys, seriously, that clam chowder is really bad. What do you mean clam chowder? It was mushroom soup.
Jay (31:53.877)
Ha ha!
Jack Der (31:55.266)
I'm like, oh, but my brain, I couldn't like distinguish that it was something else. I'm just, I'm just thinking the whole time. Oh, this is like the worst child I've ever had.
Jay (32:01.441)
Uh huh.
Jay (32:09.097)
These clams taste like mushrooms, they must have fungus on them.
Jack Der (32:13.17)
I'm like, this is the worst.
Jay (32:16.261)
Oh, that's hilarious. All right, you're number two here. You're number two tail.
Jack Der (32:21.626)
So my number two. Now remember these are, like I said, these are all in the past. And I was diving at La Jolla Cove. And La Jolla Cove on a very flat gentle day. And if you get it in the perfect conditions, it's like seriously, it's like the best dive ever. It's like an aquarium. You got this kelp billowing around.
all sorts of stuff going on. And in the springtime, we get taupe sharks. Some people call them dogfish, but it's a small schooling shark. It looks like a reef shark. And...
They were around, there was also seven gills around this time, but this day, in particular, I went by myself because these taupe sharks are really shy. They get scared really easy. If you just move, make a sound, boom, they're gone. So I wanted to go out and get some GoPro video footage of these things. I'm out there, it's like maybe 30 feet deep in the spot. There's nothing going on.
I find this little school of how we there, what's a group of sharks called? You know, a frenzy? I don't know. I think it's a frenzy, but anyways, it was a group of sharks. There was about six of these taupe sharks and they're swimming around. And I was like at this point in time, just if I had a brief re-breather at the time it would have been great, but I wasn't. I just had my open circuit.
Jay (33:43.546)
Good question, I don't know. It's probably still a school, right?
Jack Der (34:01.77)
So I just kind of like, instead of just like floating around in the water column, I kind of settled down and there's these kelp, like root balls, I guess. And there's like rocks and stuff. So I'm like settling down behind this and the kelp's flown around. And as I'm sitting really quietly, you can see all these sharks starting to swim and they get closer and closer and closer. Right. And it's like, this is awesome. I'm like looking at all these sharks and going,
Wow, this is so cool. You can see their eyes. You can see all the details. And then right as this one is coming like right up over me, awesome, I got bit.
Jay (34:42.558)
No way.
Jack Der (34:43.834)
And I let out this scream and then all the sharks took off. And I look over to see what bit me. It was actually a sheep head, not a shark. So this is, see, it's, gotcha. This is my shark bite story, right? So I was watching sharks when I got bit by a sheep.
Jay (34:57.619)
Hahaha!
Jack Der (35:10.062)
It was a big male sheephead and because I had my hand on one of the rocks there and they like Like eating the crustine whatever stuff growing on these rocks and stuff and they have these big Teeth that are used for crunching down things well, it saw my pinky just kind of like moving ever so slightly and it bit my whole pinky all the way right down to the knuckle and I let out that scream and
Everyone's like laughing at me. Ha ha ha, you got bit by a sheep head. I'm like going, yeah, it hurt. I'm like going, wait until it happens to you. They're like, oh no, it will never happen, you know? I mean, it literally feels like someone took a pliers and just like crunches your finger, right? So I'm like, so yeah, I let out the scream. Of course, years and years later, one of those, my friends that said, laughing at me, ha ha.
Jay (35:46.209)
I'm sorry.
Jay (35:56.181)
Crunched, yeah. Yeah, exactly.
Jack Der (36:06.742)
You got bit by a sheephead, it didn't hurt. Of course, he got bit by one eagle. Okay, yeah, that hurt a lot. Don't know why it hurt. I'm like, yeah, see, I told you. So yeah, yeah. So there's one of those things of, I guess this is more like be aware of your environment. Maybe it's not the actual apex predator that you should be worried about. It should be this little thing. It's like probably a foot and a half, two feet long. Comes up and just takes a...
Jay (36:13.636)
Hahaha!
Jay (36:18.741)
Told you those things hurt. Yeah.
Jay (36:26.478)
Yeah exactly.
Jay (36:35.487)
Yeah.
Jack Der (36:36.842)
takes your finger and bites it, yeah.
Jay (36:43.073)
Have you tried to find that sheephead again? Let them know what you thought about that.
Jack Der (36:46.89)
Yeah, go punch him.
Jay (36:49.197)
Was it on video? Did you get, were you like videoing the shark circling? Oh, too bad. That would have been great.
Jack Der (36:51.174)
No, no. Oh, I got the, I have video of the sharks, but not of, you know, that moment of it.
Jay (36:58.657)
I can imagine the video of the sharks and then all of a sudden, ahhhhhh! Then the video turns off and the camera falls down and...
Jack Der (37:05.042)
I will have to go look, but it was probably one of those moments of, you know, early on I'd have to say my video skills were more along the lines of snowboarding videos versus what is good for underwater. Handheld like this, going, whoa, look at that shark. It's all shaky cam.
Jay (37:16.353)
Yeah.
Jay (37:21.897)
Yeah.
Jay (37:26.001)
Yeah, yeah. That's, I have yet to be bit by anything underwater or, or snapped on anything or anything like that, um, except for, I think I told this story a while ago. Maybe it was on an episode with you where there, there are these little, they call them sunfish, these little lake fish that hang out in the shallows. And they, um, in this particular dive location get fed by other divers, um, little weenies. Like, uh,
Vienna sausages, they sell them in a little can at the little shack up the road there. And so for whatever reason, it's been this thing that people feed these little, they're not even doing deco stops, they're just like, this is fun to feed the little fish, the Vienna sausages. Anyway, yeah, no, exactly. Yeah, you see, go two ways. I'm going the other way.
Jack Der (38:13.238)
You weren't in a swimsuit, right?
Jack Der (38:17.684)
These little...
Jack Der (38:24.574)
Okay.
Jay (38:24.981)
Well, not in a swimsuit, in a speedo. No, I'm kidding. Not in a speedo. Don't go skinny dipping in this lake is what Jack's really saying. But no, when you're wearing dry gloves, your hands tend to look a little like a Vienna sausage apparently. And so you get to like a stop and you sit there and you're holding whatever, your 20-foot stop and all these little sunfish start accumulating in front of you.
And you're like, what are you little Jacko, Jacko blinders up to? Like, what are you gonna do here, you freaking Jacko? And then all of a sudden you're looking at one on this side and it's like they're like a hive mind or something. And one of them goes on your left hand, just a little like, boop, you're like, wait, hey, get out of here. Like, get, then my hands on the van stops. And then as you're dealing with that guy, the other guy goes for your other hand, deek. And you spend your like, your stops, you know, on your way up and your ascent.
Jack Der (39:07.913)
like piranha.
Jay (39:22.761)
like fighting off sunfish from biting your fingers. So that's the only thing I've ever been bit by, which they don't, I don't know if they have teeth. At least I never felt like they did. Both in dry gloves and not dry gloves, so just my hands. But they're more annoying than painful. It just kind of feels like a chicken peck or something, just like a little pop, like pressure. It doesn't hurt, but other than that, never been bit so far, knock on wood.
Jack Der (39:42.51)
Thanks for watching!
Jay (39:52.061)
Is that the only thing you've been bit by underwater by the way?
Jack Der (39:55.526)
Uh, no, I'm sure there's, there's plenty of other things. I mean, I've, I've had the.
Jay (40:00.385)
There was that girl you were dating that one time. No. Ha ha ha.
Jack Der (40:05.93)
No, I think for sure I had like a sunfish type thing too. This would kind of like lead into my third story. But anyways, I grew up around lakes. So yeah, I know there's things I had like sunfish and stuff, you know, they nibble at you. And of course, you know, I can think, I was like, what is that? Yeah, it's underwater.
Jay (40:30.139)
Get away from me. Have you seen those, I don't know if you have any, I saw the shark repellent, I think it's a bracelet that you can wear, an anklet that you can wear that's supposed to repel sharks away. Have you seen that thing?
Jack Der (40:41.646)
Oh.
Jack Der (40:46.706)
I've seen those because of surfing. That's one of those things that they always used to put in the surf magazines and stuff like that. I guess it's for a diver that's like counterintuitive. It's like, no, why would, why do I want to scare these things away?
Jay (41:00.957)
Yeah, yeah. No, it's interesting. My first real shark encounter was bull sharks in Playa, actually. They come out around Thanksgiving. That's their pupping season. And by the way, a group of sharks, according to Google, school, frenzy, or shiver, I think I'm pronouncing that, S-H-I-V-E-R, a shiver of sharks.
Jack Der (41:28.74)
Ah, yeah, that was the other name.
Jay (41:30.685)
Yeah, shiver school or frenzy. I think I like frenzy better, even though that sounds a little scary, but anyway, w we're bull sharks. Yeah. Group. Hey, yeah, they're, they're a school. They're yeah. A school of sharks doesn't sound. So maybe that's why there's a shiver. I wonder if that's true. Oh, they're like, I wonder if I wonder how they define that scientifically. Uh, a whole nother episode of like, what is the groupings?
Jack Der (41:38.246)
A group, they sound too friendly. You know, a group, you know, hey buddy, how's it going?
Jay (41:59.157)
How do you decide what a grouping of something is named? Is it, I mean, obviously species, but like pelagic fish versus, I don't know, interesting. Because you just think of all fish that go together are a school for whatever reason, but that's not true.
Jack Der (42:17.238)
Well, it's like, what is it? Squid or like, they're called like a squad.
Jay (42:21.873)
Squad, yeah. Like that one. It's my favorite. Okay, I'll tell my third one and then it leads into your fourth or your third one sounds like. So this tale for our Reef of Horrors episode is a throwback to one of my favorite authors. Also, I think some of the best cinematic amazingness that's ever come out ever. And also,
This I think labels me as potentially a nerd here or there. So think of me what you will, but I love them. This third tale is titled, My Precious. That's the best I can do. That was horrible. Somewhere Andy Serkis is like, fire that guy. Which by the way, that guy has golem.
Jack Der (43:10.835)
We go, we go.
Jay (43:19.665)
or Smeagol, whichever one you want to adopt, as both really. Ah, incredible, incredible acting. I mean, gosh, you paved the way. I actually just watched the making of Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume Three, and fasting, because you see a lot of the same technology that they pioneered in Lord of the Rings for Smeagol, Gollum. Now, I mean, it's just utilized for all kinds of characters for things that guards the galaxy. So, side note, but my precious.
So here's the story.
Yeah, everyone out there is going, hey, you little nerd, you like Lord of the Rings? Yes, I do, I think it's a great story.
Jack Der (43:58.931)
He's just saying, Jay says that all the time about his split fins.
Jay (44:02.273)
That's right. One split fin is named Aragon and the other one is named, I can't, what's the, I can't remember his name right now, the elf. Oh, or Lego loss. There it is, Lego loss. Man, I can't believe I forgot that. Anyways, my precious. So on a dive, we are running real. And I think this was, yeah, this was definitely a training dive. One of those really tough training drives.
Jack Der (44:14.615)
Oh, Legolas.
Jay (44:32.757)
And gosh, it seems like all my horror stories come from training drives, but this one did. And, you know, this was the dive that was kind of driving home the point that we need to be able to solve problems underwater, right? Not go to the surface. So no matter how we solve things, things were going to continue to compound on this dive, right? That's just the way it was going to go. Of course, we didn't know that, but that was the point of the dive.
And so we're there and we, I had, I was running, I was the captain. So I ran the reel and wherever we were, it wasn't crazy thing. And, um, we're coming back on the dive and, you know, everything kind of starts to go wrong, right? This guy's out of gas. This guy lost his mask. There goes that guy's, you know, whatever is deco bottles gone. It's just compounding, compounding. And meanwhile, I'm trying to maintain, you know, the path home.
So I'm trying to protect our path home with the real, hey, we need to follow the line. And by the way, I'll tell you what I should have done after the story, but I didn't do it in the time. So I'm holding onto this real, because in my mind, it's the lifeline home. Like this is how we get home. And look, like we all gotta share gas and do seven different ways and figure out some sort of team positioning to make all of this work, but I'm not getting rid of this freaking real because.
This is our, this is, this is home, but don't have this, we're screwed. And so, you know, we're going along and I keep on reeling in a little bit, keep the real, the line tight as, you know, as best I can, and then this would go wrong. Oh, reel it in. I'm not letting go with this hand. I'm deal with you on this hand. You can imagine underwater. And all of a sudden, you know, finally we kind of get things sorted. We're starting to move and I feel like, okay, we're, we've got to be close to the exit. You're so disoriented at this point. And I start reeling. And as I'm.
You know, as you're reeling in, you're looking ahead of you in the line where you're going, because you're following that. As I start reeling, you know, the team positioning at this point are two divers right in front of me, because we're some sort of weird gash in configuration at this point, because everyone's had problems and there's two divers directly in front of me and then the line and I remember the diver to my left, it's a good friend of mine now.
Jay (46:53.105)
I remember him turning and you know, underwater you can read that body language of just like, this is not going to be good. And as he turns towards me, I see his eyes and I go, oh, this is really not going to be good. And he has in his hand the end of the line that's broken off somewhere else. And you just go like, oh my, you know, Lord or whatever, whoever you pray to in that moment, like ah!
Jack Der (47:00.683)
It's the eyes.
Jay (47:21.525)
The line is snapped. Like, oh my gosh, like how in the F are we gonna get out of here? Like, ugh. And so, you know, there's that real feeling of panic. Like, because in my mind, I had built it up so long that like, this is how we get home. Is this real? That boom, it snapped. We're finally somewhat sorted of all the craziness that had happened. And now the line's snapped. And there were two thoughts that went through my mind. Like one, like, holy, blah, blah.
And the other one was like the instructor, he cut the line. Like this one, you're going to cut the line after all this. You're going to cut our freaking line. Oh my gosh. So, you know, the, the protocol there is at this point, put the reel down. It's not doing any good. Not me. No, I'm taking that freaking reel with me wherever we go. It's my lifeline. So you hold onto it.
We establish the direction of, because the line will fall basically straight down in the water. So we knew the direction we were heading, we didn't change that. So we decided to search directly ahead of us. And however many kicks forward, five, 10, however many it was, boom, there was the other end of the line. And 10 kicks from there, we were on the exit. And so at that point, we were, I think I was...
was told to leave the reel, like let's get out of here, let's exit and boom, let's go. So we exit the dive and we get to the surface and you know we're going oh my gosh we can't believe we made it through that one, that one was super challenging blah blah. The two instructors decided hey we're going to go down clean up the mess you guys made left down there so you guys just need to stay on the surface and breathe and I'll get your reel don't worry and blah we'll take care of it all. So they go underwater, they do their thing, they come back up all good.
We go home. So, later that night in the debrief, the two instructors who I have massive tons of respect for and amazing divers, their minds are just laughing their tails off because they showed us the video and they said literally they went underwater and they're looking for the real and someone found it and they're thinking to each other.
Jay (49:44.145)
at the exact same time they're thinking the exact same thought. And one of them had pulled out who didn't have the reel, his wet notes and wrote down the words, my precious and showed it to the other instructor and the instructor started laughing and started petting the reel. And it's like, of course, because the correct thing to do if you get into that situation, by the way, tie the dang or bury it in the sand, tie the reel off, you still have the line, you don't need to take it with you and go home.
You know, the line, the real is not your lifeline. The line is your lifeline. And so follow the line, go home, come back another day and get the real or leave it a hundred bucks is done. But not me. I was going to hold onto that freaking real for dear life because I made that wrong correlation between the real and the line, right? At that point, a great learning moment. So that real since that day.
has now been deemed my precious, has been named my precious. I literally, it's written on there in Sharpie, it is now my precious, I take it with me when I go on wherever I need a reel, and my precious goes with me everywhere I need to. So, you know, the scary part of that dive was finding the end of the line that wasn't the end of the line. And it turns out, by the way, they didn't cut the line. That was all because of the tugging and pulling the line snap.
Jack Der (50:45.647)
Nice.
Jack Der (51:06.702)
pulling the tension.
Jay (51:07.273)
by itself from all the pulling and tension that I kept on it. So awesome learning moments, awesome all that, but wow, was it something to see the end of the line, you're real in the hand and a cut line and not knowing where the heck you're supposed to go was a pretty scary moment. So yeah, my precious.
Jack Der (51:29.052)
So, did they tell you later on that you should have done a lost line type of drill? And anchor off at that point and then use the reel to go find the other line?
Jay (51:41.161)
Well, so we could have done that. Because we could see it wasn't a no-vis situation, we still could search and search directly in front. And so we established that's what, you know, what I really appreciate about all that training too is like the way that's taught is always, you know, there's no wrong answer. There are just more efficient ways to deal with it. And so our decision at that point, I don't know how many ways
Jack Der (51:48.234)
Oh, right.
Jack Der (51:52.703)
and see it right there.
Jack Der (52:08.094)
Yeah, if you see it right there. Yeah.
Jay (52:09.933)
hoses were going for share was like, let's just see because we know it would fall right there if it was going to fall if it's there. If not, we've got to figure out another strategy, right? And so we've got to figure out what to do at this point. So, but yeah, it was fascinating.
Jack Der (52:17.058)
Mm-hmm.
Jack Der (52:26.506)
Yeah. That works in a cave. In the ocean, the line's like, it's going all over the place.
Jay (52:32.541)
We are all facing side. Goodbye.
Jack Der (52:36.93)
But yeah, no, that'd be, I mean, I remember like going through the K class and it was like, and going through the exercise of a broken line. And it was like, and like, I was always sitting there thinking, Oh, where's the line going to go? Cause I'm thinking like ocean type stuff. And it was like line cutter. Oh, look at that. It just dropped right where it was. Like that's amazing. So I was.
Jay (52:58.137)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's funny because everyone feels like cave diving. Cave diving is serious. Oh, let me put it that way. In terms of the planning, in terms of navigation, in terms of, you gotta know your stuff. You gotta be together. But in terms of the diving part of it, you know, the dealing with current or visibility most of the time, so on and so forth.
I mean, it's kind of beautiful, nice diving. Like it's pretty easy diving in that sense. Although the rest of it's very hard and very serious. But in terms of like clear water, no current line falls right, you know, in front of you. I mean, it's really nice in that sense. But then there's a lot of other things that are not so nice in terms of, or not that they're not nice, but are much more serious than maybe a technical ocean dive.
Jack Der (53:51.682)
Well, yeah, yeah. I mean, you definitely have to take all that stuff seriously, but it is nice if you're in one of those caves and it's when they talk about 100 foot clear water viz, you get that there sometimes like, wow, as long as your light can shine out there, you can see, you know, and it's like, not that I have horror stories about cave diving. Hmm. Try. No, they're all pretty good. I've gone through a few of the.
Jay (54:14.225)
Hahaha
Jack Der (54:20.85)
scenarios of you know like the blown first stage and stuff like that. But again it's like because you're trained prepared not so scary right because it's like oh hey look at that my regulator just went turn it off.
Jay (54:30.513)
Yes. Yeah.
Jay (54:35.997)
Yeah, no big deal. Turn it up. Yeah, no big deal. Yeah. It's, you know, there, obviously there are things that can happen that you can't train for. Um, right. But a lot of things that we know from a lot of the, you know, accident or malfunction reports you can train for. So if it's the first time you see it, when it happens on a, you know, on a, I don't want to say real dive, but on a dive that's not designed for, for training.
Yeah, that's a scary moment. But if it's not the first time you've seen it, even if you don't remember the protocol exactly to fix it or you don't, you know, whatever, you don't do it perfectly, there is this like almost an antibody that gets built mentally that says like, oh, I know how I've seen this before. I know I can get out of it. You know, like is that feeling? So yeah, I think there's something to be said about training that isn't necessarily just on a line, but that...
that you're diving and things go wrong to a point. I think that there's also a point where there's just no return on that kind of, I've seen some break me down dives that I just don't like that and agree with that style of training where it's just a break me down dive for the sake of breaking you down. But using your mistakes against you and showing you the logical conclusion, huge, huge proponent, it's taught me a ton. So anyway, this is the reef of horrors, not the good training, bad training episode. What am I talking about here?
Jack Der (56:04.078)
What do you mean, they go hand in hand?
Jay (56:07.348)
That's true. That's true. All right. What's your third one?
Jack Der (56:08.962)
sometimes.
So, okay, my third, I never came up with titles on these things, I'm not that fancy. Third story is maybe not so much a story, but I think a lot of people may sympathize with this and understand where I'm going with this and how it was scary for me, okay? And how it has affected me, okay? So this is kind of like, oh, Jack's gonna get all like.
open book, weepy type thing. So going back a little bit of history. Okay, so I'm this kid who played ice hockey. I was the guy who, oh, built a jump with the bike and would jump off it, no helmet, you know, I was one of those kids, you know, doing all these traumatic things, right? And there was a time I went to a movie.
when in my youth, no one told me it was supposed to be scary. They just said, oh yeah, it's a movie about sharks. OK, so you're all going to understand where this is going eventually. So I'm at this movie theater. And OK, so if you, by the way, if you haven't seen this movie in the actual theater on a big screen, you won't understand the feeling that you get.
Jay (57:22.393)
Ha ha, duh-duh, duh-duh.
Jack Der (57:37.726)
It's totally different if you watch it on TV, even if it's a big screen TV, it's not the same. So here I am, this kid just thinking, oh, shark movie, okay, let's see what's going on. And obviously the movie is Jaws. So I'm sitting there watching this thing, and then the first thing that pops out is this music, right? The, you know, all that noise, right? And I'm like, oh, this is, I'm like, whoa, this is weird.
Jay (58:01.057)
Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da
Jack Der (58:05.978)
So like I should learn all these movie things, right? As a kid, it was like really impactful for me. And it's like the very first scene, you know, the head pops out of the front of the boat. And I'm just like, okay, I'm done. I'm out of here. Can I go? I'm like, oh, no, no. So then we go through the whole thing. You know, the woman's being tossed around and all that stuff. And I'm like, finally, once we got to the actual scene of the shark.
Jay (58:19.849)
Hahaha
Jack Der (58:34.738)
And everyone's like, ah, so fake looking. I'm like, at this point in time, my mind as a kid is just like, screw water.
Jay (58:45.697)
I'm never taking a bath again.
Jack Der (58:48.912)
I am not kidding. I had after that movie watching that. By the way, I think it's a great movie. I've watched it. I don't know how many times now. Maybe it's because it's like it affected me so profoundly when I was young. No, there's actually times like I'd be in the pool, like friend's pools and I'd go, okay, yeah, it's in a pool. What am I thinking? But I was like this little kid, right? I'm like freaking out.
Jay (59:01.409)
facing your fears or something. Yeah.
Jay (59:09.589)
Ha ha!
Jack Der (59:15.71)
And then this is, okay, this is where I wanted to jump to. Like as I got older, okay, my adventurous spirit still stayed intact. Like things like going jet skiing at night in these lakes, which is maybe not the smartest thing to do. I would go rock climbing. I'm the guy who would pre-climb things and look down and go, oh, look, I'm like 100 some.
feet up off the ground standing on this little edge like, no big deal. So it wasn't, I was very confident in my abilities, athletic abilities and all these things. But man, you know, the jet skiing thing at night, the mosquitoes were so bad that we were waiting in the water, because this is Minnesota by the way, mosquitoes, it's a real legit thing. If one of those was in my dry suit, I would be freaked out, just so you know.
Jay (01:00:07.507)
Mm.
Jay (01:00:10.593)
Ha ha
Jack Der (01:00:13.346)
Blood everywhere so I'm sitting in the water waiting for my turn to go next on this thing and I'm sitting there going huh, it's black. It's dark water Can't see any lights you hear this thing out there in the lake driving around. We didn't have lights. It's stupid I mean, it's literally the stupid thing to do as a kid And I'm sitting there in the water Allison my mind starts
venturing to this movie again. Right? I'm like, I'm in a lake. I'm in a lake. It's fresh water. My brain is just like going, okay, crap. There's something in here. It's gonna bite me. And I'm always thinking like, oh, maybe it's a snapping turtle or there's gonna be like some northern pike or some fish with teeth that's gonna bite me. And then just as I'm thinking all this stuff, little sunfish or little things start nipping at my legs. And I'm like,
Jay (01:00:44.633)
Oh no!
Jack Der (01:01:11.962)
I was like out of the water in like seconds up on the deck and I'm like screw this I'm going home. I was like out of the water. But it's those kinds of things that has like even going down the road right. I moved to California I started surfing. I'm always doing this in the water. I can't see down there. Someone goes, ah leper shark. I'm like, this is before I knew leopard sharks weren't. I'm like, ah leper shark.
Jay (01:01:18.892)
Bite me mosquitoes all you want.
Jay (01:01:34.569)
Yeah.
Jay (01:01:38.145)
Ha ha!
Jack Der (01:01:41.562)
I don't want to like taking my feet up out of the water, stuff like that. And so there was always this like fear of like what was underwater that I couldn't see. Right. And that's always been kind of like this little phobia. And then all of a sudden, I started scuba diving. It was like.
Jay (01:01:51.393)
Mm-hmm.
Jack Der (01:02:01.23)
Where are the sharks? Because every time you get out of the water, or at the ocean, you go, hey, did you see a shark? And you're like, no, dang it, I wanted to see one. It's like, they're not as big and scary as my brain has made them up to be throughout my whole life, right? Even surfing, I would like, okay, I gotta go surfing. The wave, oh, someone said there's white sharks out there today. I'm like, mm, if I don't see it, I'll be fine. I'll just surf.
Jay (01:02:19.07)
Yeah.
Jay (01:02:30.365)
Yeah, I'm just kidding.
Jack Der (01:02:31.726)
But later on, scuba diving, that's kind of like ease those fears. And I've moved into going on shark dives in the Bahamas, with the great hammerheads, going to Jupiter, Florida, diving with tiger sharks and all that stuff. And then even La Jolla Shores, I was in there diving with those sharks and not having that fear standpoint, other than, remember I was saying that there were seven gill sharks around?
The first time I saw a seven-gill shark, I was with a group of people and I was kind of like leading the way because like I supposedly knew where I was going, but I just knew I go this way and then turn left and turn. So I was a leader, follow me. And it was like, okay, this seems like the place where we turn left. So I'm like looking back over my right shoulder, like, hey, we're gonna go over here. And I see these people behind me kind of like looking at me kind of weird. And I turned this way and just like.
Jay (01:03:11.829)
Heheheheheheh
Follow me!
Jack Der (01:03:30.122)
an arm's length away is a big, huge like eight, nine foot, seven girl shark right next to me. I'm like, first thing is like, and I'm like, and then my second thought was like, seriously, where's the music?
Jay (01:03:38.534)
UGH!
Jay (01:03:45.778)
Yeah.
Jack Der (01:03:48.45)
Like you can't just sneak up on me and not make a sound. You know, it's in the water but so part of this is like, you know, my phobias growing up and then how they've Eased with time. There's still that fear factor. I mean there's I i'm gonna reference back to when I was beginning to dive, you know, because i'm an expert now I would go on, you know Like let's go lobster diving. I'm like hmm
Jay (01:03:52.686)
Hehehe...
Jack Der (01:04:17.09)
That was kind of scary. You're down there literally by yourself with the little light trying to surge, just pushing you around and all this stuff. And then you don't know what these shadows are and it's just kelp moving around, right? So you're like, oh, that was just kelp, right? And then you're freaking out. So my brain again goes to this whole shark thing and then, oh, next day.
And this is when I was working at the Union Tribune. So I had instant access to the news. And it's like, shark sighted at blah, blah. And I'm like.
That's where I was diving last night by myself looking for lobsters. And that whole time I'm sitting there thinking, wow, something's watching me. It wasn't maybe, maybe it wasn't just kelp. So yeah. So it's just, that's that viewer part. Not knowing what's there, you know.
Jay (01:04:57.877)
hahahaha
Jay (01:05:07.477)
Hehehehe
Jay (01:05:12.565)
I wonder how many people have got a complex from Steven Spielberg from that movie at this point around sharks. By the way, have you gone and seen Bruce? The name of the fake shark was Bruce. Did you ever get a chance to see him at Universal?
Jack Der (01:05:28.446)
I, yes, I've gone up there and seen it and yes, in person, it's like, that's not so impressive, but in the movie, and if you ever get a chance to see it on a big screen with the full on sound system, and recently they did a rerun of that, probably like five years ago, in one of the theaters here in San Diego, and there's only like a dozen people in the theater. It was awesome. It's like brought all those.
Jay (01:05:36.156)
Yeah.
Jack Der (01:05:56.746)
those things right back because it was the sound, the dark, you know, and you're, and especially in this theater at that time, because there weren't a lot of people in there. So it was like isolated and I tend to put myself in these environments. So it's definitely different than watching on a TV from your couch. I mean, it was like, it's a good movie.
Jay (01:06:11.938)
Mm.
Jay (01:06:15.973)
Yeah, I had two takeaways from your story. One is like, yeah, why haven't sharks biologically evolved to whenever they're swimming, they make that sound like through their gills, like, da, da. And then when they get closer, it just gets more intense and faster. Like it should, right? I mean, come on, where's the intelligent design in that? Right? Come on. Yeah, they need their own like, you know, yeah.
Jack Der (01:06:25.739)
Make sounds.
Jack Der (01:06:30.577)
I know.
Jack Der (01:06:34.283)
Right.
Jack Der (01:06:40.242)
Yeah, they need a soundtrack, you know, the walk-in music.
Jay (01:06:45.637)
Exactly. I mean, they need something. Yeah. And then, you know, the other thought that popped in my head is, you know, wouldn't that be just be a, because I think you can get underwater speakers now, like that you can play music underwater. I don't know how you'd pull it off, but there are some new like iPhone, you know, apps or iPhone cases and maybe Bluetooth works underwater. I don't know. But wouldn't it be funny if you could take a speaker with you and then like halfway through a dive and kind of a
weird spot you just hit play on the Jaws theme.
Jack Der (01:07:18.302)
Well, well, that not quite happened. But but obviously with a dry suit, you're dry. I had a tendency for a while there to forget I had my phone in my pocket. Which is not a big deal because you're dry. But I was down underwater and like on and boats do play their speakers down towards the water and you can hear it while you're diving. So I'm like sitting there thinking.
I'm down there diving at the shores and I hear this music, I'm going, wow, whoever is on the boat out there is playing music I really like. It's, wow, it sounds like my soundtrack. Wow, they're just playing all the music I like and they're going through. And then finish the dive, get to the car, and I'm like going, oh, my phone's in my pocket. And I hold it up and I'm like, oh, it's been playing my playlist the whole time.
Jay (01:08:01.217)
Britney Spears, like the Britney Spears classics.
Jay (01:08:09.537)
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Jay (01:08:16.893)
Man, I think I'm gonna cough a lung up. That's hilarious. Yeah, I mean, you can hear so much better under the water. Now, yeah, there you go, dry suit, and you just gotta figure out how to like, get it to play and then stop. You know what I'm saying? Punch yourself.
Jack Der (01:08:31.69)
But well, I'm thinking I'm thinking with that new Apple watch.
Jay (01:08:36.333)
Ah, there you go, there you go. We have a prank to pull on some of our dive team. That would be.
Jack Der (01:08:44.492)
Just download that soundtrack and then go... Beep! Ha ha ha!
Jay (01:08:47.424)
Beep, yeah. Right by their ear. Just swim right above them and put your arm with your watch right by their ear.
Jack Der (01:08:55.385)
Yeah, right in their six so they can't see you.
Jay (01:08:57.905)
Yeah, they can't see you. They won't know you're there. And they'll hear this, dun, dun. Oh my gosh, that'd be hilarious. I feel like I'm gonna put a fake scorpion in your boots and you're gonna play the Jaws song to me halfway through a dive on our next one. And then we'll come back into an episode together where we would like yell at each other about how mad we are.
Jack Der (01:09:00.33)
And then, duh, duh.
Jack Der (01:09:08.49)
Hahaha
Jack Der (01:09:16.43)
to.
Jack Der (01:09:19.55)
Yeah, but that's, but you know, all that stuff, that's what makes it fun. You know, you got all these stories that you go forward with, you know, of all the. Well, it's just like, no, we're talking about these things, right? These are all that camaraderie, you know, talking about stuff. I mean, that's why it's like great to go out and have food after diving, besides, you know, getting hungry while diving. Um, hopefully not, hopefully get some better clam chowder than that mushroom soup.
Jay (01:09:40.617)
Yeah, exactly.
Jay (01:09:49.439)
Yeah, next time it'll be zebra muscle clowder chowder. There you go. Let's call a diver that rhymes with a deucer annual and see if he can provide some, some of our zebra mussels for our next soup here.
Jack Der (01:09:56.016)
Oh, a little gritty.
Jay (01:10:10.089)
Well, good Jack. Well, thank you for doing this on the reef of whores. Cue the scary music episode. I had a blast. Oh no. Yeah, I'm sure Daniel has added, I don't know how many sound effects now, which is a lot of fun, but thanks for joining me. I had a blast and yeah, Jack works for a company called DUI.
Jack Der (01:10:18.974)
Yeah, and then look around.
Jay (01:10:38.721)
Diving Unlimited International. And if you are interested in a dry suit or you've been thinking about one, Jack is your man to talk to, literally. Reach out to Jack. Jack, what's your email that they can get a hold of you?
Jack Der (01:10:54.559)
jder at divedui.com
Jay (01:10:59.617)
There you go, jder at divedui.com. Reach out to Jack if you've been thinking about it or you just wanna kick the tires and learn more about dry suits. I got my dry suit from Jack. I love it. I've been using it every dive I've been on since. So I highly endorse DUI's products and think they're great. And so yeah, check them out. And if you wanna learn more about the dive table or get the next episode that comes out.
Make sure that you subscribe wherever you get your podcast and you can also check us out at thedivetable.com. Thanks for joining us today on the Reef of Horrors and we hope to have you back on the next episode of the Dive Table.
